Legwork

 

I feel that I should probably shave or wax my legs. I have not shaved or waxed my legs for over a year.

 

Arguments against leg-hair removal are as follows:

 

  1. It is dangerous. Not messing-with-terrorists, kayaking-over-waterfalls sort of dangerous: we’re talking low-level danger here. Danger of cutting your leg and making it bleed. Of causing mild pain. Of having explaining to do when your toddler wanders in. Which is more danger than is strictly necessary if you ask me. There are other ways to get adrenaline.

  2. It is messy. Blood is messy; wax is very messy (especially when it bubbles over in the microwave). Even wax strips make a mess. Pink waxy bits stuck to your white bath, carpet, whatever: ugh. Cleaning the little dark hairs from the bath: annoying. In fact there is no way to do your legs that doesn’t end up with cleaning-up to do afterwards.

  3. It is undignified. Only ladies in Veet adverts look or feel good when doing their legs. The rest of us get into awkward positions, finds ourselves with one leg balanced on the side of the bath like Bridget Jones or squished underneath us while we reach the backs. We get to examine our leg-pimples, have a close encounter with some of our wobbly bits and – see above – make a mess.

  4. There is no good physical reason to do so. Your legs don’t smell less if you take the hair off; your leg pimples don’t get smaller. It is purely aesthetic – and lets face it, summer has gone and they’re hidden behind trousers anyway, right?

  5. It is a war that you are never going to win. It doesn’t matter how carefully you wax or shave (or do something painful with a little electronic machine that I don’t really want to think about) the stuff will always grow back. Just like the bindweed on my lawn. Look away for a fortnight and you’re back to square one.

  6. It costs money. Not oodles of money, but remember: I am from Yorkshire.

  7. It actually says on the back of many waxing strips ‘not suitable for diabetics’. This is in case I have diabetic neuropathy (nerve damage) and manage to injure my legs without feeling it, resulting in an ulcer or infection. I’m not sure that my personal chances of this are very high to be honest, but still….

 

Arguments in favour of leg-hair removal are as follows:

 

  1. We get to comply with people’s expectations regarding the state of women’s legs. Women’s legs aren’t supposed to have hair, gerrit? Anyone unsure of this should check out the legs in any fashion magazine.

  2. When we – or someone else – runs a hand down our legs, they feel smooth.

  3. This makes us feel in control and therefore happy.

 

It’s a no-brainer, really. What have I been waiting for all these months? Now that I’m four months post-sprog and feeling better about myself a little bit, I’m going to stop Letting Myself Go. I’m going to sort it out. Get smooth legs, dammit.

 

Logical sort of a species, aren’t we?

 

 

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Legwork

  1. LOL A man’s perspective. Shave or don’t shave your choice, but make it a life choice. Shaved legs are pretty. So are harry legs. The only problem is stubble. Very old hair is soft, no hair is smooth. It’s the some times shavers with sand paper stubble that bug me.

  2. I shave my legs because I have eczema and if I don’t (and they get stubbly) they itch more. So there’s another reason for your “for” list.
    Also, if you get waxed at a salon they have to clear up the mess 😉

  3. Thankyou for that; preparedness to maintain or accept stubble is definitely a point I’ve missed out here :0D A point I hadn’t missed however, was the one about what would make men happy or otherwise; that deliberately doesn’t get a mention.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s